What's with all the hoopla over Madonna adopting the kid from Africa? Why isn't this old news just 6 days out from a very important election in America? The FACTS: The kid is better off with her than he was in an orphanage that was under-funded and under-staffed, and where a great deal of kids don't make it past the age of five. She will make sure he gets back to his homeland very often to get to know his father (whom hadn't stopped by the orphanage to see him since he was two months old) and to know his homeland's customs and culture--and yes, sad but true, people with butt-loads of money move to the top of the list for anything and everything, including adoption. Get over it.
Kerry, shut the hell up! Go back to Massachusetts, you aren't even on a ballot for anything, you couldn't speak well in 2004, and you certainly haven't learned how to do it now. You're as bad for us as Rush is for the Republicans (well, and Bush and Cheney and Rumsfeld and Foley and Frist and Delay...) Okay,so maybe you aren't as bad as all of them rolled into one, but still--learn to bash Bush correctly, or shut up!
I can't believe they killed Ekko on Lost!! Holy cow! Who's going to beat people with the Jesus Stick now??
Speaking of Jesus Sticks, Jesus Man and Jesus Woman from earlier were back to let us know that they were praying for us, and offered to drive us to the revival tonight and every night this week!! Where the hell do these people get off? Do you not see our two cars parked out front? Don't you think if we wanted to go, we'd drive there our fuckin' selves? Since they left their daughter somewhere where we evil homosexuals couldn't get a hold of here to convert her to "the other side," I was a little more confrontational this time:
What the hell!! Why can't people just take a polite "No thanks" and leave it go? And people tell me fundies aren't socialists--Puh-leaze! They left the material anyway. Basically, Satan is controlling my mind, I'm demon possessed, we already knew I was going to hell, but it also seems my homosexuality has something to do with repressed memories of sexual abuse, alcohol abuse, and absent father, not being good at sports, joining the band, and a whole host of other things and stereotypes that Jesus can cure me of--I suppose salvation means a football scholarship? I know it just pisses off fundies that not every gay person was sexually abused (as I was not), that a lot of us had loving fathers (like I have), that some of us are good at sports and athletically engaged (okay, not me on that one--the brochure on that pleads to my sense of being bullied and having low self-esteem at not being able to catch a football or some other such nonsense), or that we are all drama queens in an actor's troop(again, not me--I avoided drama club just because).
Me: You're back?
Jesus Woman: We just wanted to remind you--
Me: Yes, the revival. Thank's, but no thanks.
Jesus Man: Son, I don't think you under--
Me: Don't call me son. I have a father already.
Jesus Man: --that you could end up in hell--
Rich: (yelling from kitchen) Who is it?
Me: The Christian revival people!
Jesus Man: Son, are you listening to me?
Jesus Woman: If it's a matter of getting there, we'd be happy to take you there tonight and let Jesus--
Me: Not interested. Good-bye.
(I close the front door. They knock again)
(from outside the closed door)
Jesus Man: We're just leaving some material here for you to--
Me: (reopening front door) No, because I'll only burn it in the coal stove. Please leave.
Rich: (yelling from kitchen) Are they gone yet? Dinner's ready!
Me: (looking at them on the front porch) They're leaving now.
Jesus Man: (shouting over my head towards Rich's general direction) Sir, we have some reading material for you--
(I slam door closed.)
I'll wrap this up for now. I'm all pissed off again that people can't show a modicum of respect when having been politely turned away. Next thing you know, they'll be praying on my front lawn, spritzing holy water on my dog, and hanging crucifixes on my windows...
Sigh.
I know Kelly hasn't updated her blog lately, but she's a new mommy!!! Her daughter is adorable! Stop by and congratulate her if you have time!
5 comments:
[typo corrections] Ya'no, one thang I learned under my ol' psuedo-fundy days is that the bible never really refers to a literal hell. Original translations of the bible's many books from early languages to latin, and then from latin to other more modern languages have made those translations the victim of many bad assumptions in the context of the times in which the translations took place. One of the more confused areas of translation is references to "hell". It seems a slam dunk to believe the bible is clear about hell when reading from an english bible that uses the english word "hell". But you would never know that one word "hell" is being used as the translation for 3 separate terms from 2 ancient languages that don't really convey the modern understand of hell. Modern ideas of hell developed during the middle ages based the sparse poorly translated references in the bible and traditions of non-biblical origins that bare more similarity to Greek Mythology rather than biblical cannon.
hello jason! i leaving reading material in every bag and box i give you from now on!! :) :) snort snort just had to say that! i am also glad you felt you had a good father. yes, you did not have any sports no how but that was fine with me since i hate sports and i hated it even more when i had to pretend to like the sports you kids got into!! maybe thats whats wrong with you, i did not pretend enough!! :) love and prayers
Judgemental, annoying bastards. I had a two-man Baptist team knocking on my door a few years ago (before Mike moved in) asking for the "man of the house"...when I said "you're looking at her", they stared at me as if I had spoken Chinese. When they started talking again and telling me who they were, I quickly shot them away by telling them I had "eye of newt" boiling on the stove. Slam! Unlike your group, they never came back.
Yep, I'm a new (and too-busy-to-update-my-blog) mommy. AND my blog may have permanently gotten my in-laws off my back! HOO YAW!! That's their excuse for getting mad at me and the husband anyway and that's fine by me. I will be updating soon, but thanks for still thinking of me!
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