Wednesday, April 20, 2011

A Tale of a Fateful Flick...

The writing challenge continues from Indie Ink. You know the drill: we writers swap challenges and write about them--we have until 11 p.m. on Thursday evening to meet these challenges or bad things happen! New contestants are always welcome to join by going to the link and signing up! Feel free to visit (most of) the blogs of the other writers taking this challenge in the column to the right (yes, I need to update it, but that is most of them)... Welcome to my week 6. As always, feel free to leave comments, suggestions, and other neuronically-fired feedback either in the comments here, or on Twitter or Facebook!

Week 5.
My Challenger: Zee
My Challenge: You have three objects in your pocket. What are they and why do you carry them around?
Who I am Challenging: Flaming Nyx
What I Challenged Them With: Tell me a story that involves: a toaster, a Jehovah's witness, nuclear war, Ivana Trump, and the painting "The Lady of Shallot." Oh, and have fun! :)
Previous Challenges I have answered:
[Week 1.] [Week 2.] [Week 3.] [Week 4.] [Week 5.]

A Tale of a Fateful Flick

(Muy importante: Read to the tune of Gilligan's Island...)

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a Levi's pocket
That rested on these thunder thighs
With more friction than research rocket.

The first object was a bright orange zippo lighter,
It's flame quite bright and sure.
It lit cigarettes for weeks and weeks
For nicotine to ensure (for nicotine to ensure...)

The second object was a pack of cig's,
It's contents getting quite low,
If not for the presence of the credit card
The habit would be lost (the habit would be lost...)

The pocket and content went to the shop of this tiny red-neck town,
With shaky hands,
The lighter too,
The wallet and it's cash,
The order placed,
With a swipe and a pin entered in,
Just to keep the pockets filled!

So this is the tale of the three objects,
They're here for a long, long time,
They'll continue to grace my presence,
(As this gets hard to rhyme.)

The cigarette and the zippo lighter,
Will do their very best,
To make their owner comfortable,
With nicotine that's so blessed.

No patch, no gum, and no withdrawal,
It's a singular luxury,
Like the Marlboro cowboy,
It's succulent as can be.

So don't join us here each day my friends,
If second-hand smoke you do not like,
From my pockets to my lips,
My three objects I do like!

As a disclaimer, I would just like to add that I do not advocate anyone taking up this filthy habit. However, if we can't have a little fun about our vices and realize it is a silly thing to light a bunch of dead leaves on fire, suck it into your lungs, and thoroughly trick your brain into believing it's something it can't live without? Well, then...

Oh, and to read the actual lyrics to Gilligan's Island, go here. (Trust me, I had to go back and forth a few times to try to keep the tempo and syllables right--there's no shame in you having to do so as well...) :)


Marian said...

thanks a fucking lot, jason, i will NEVER get that song out of my head!!
oh, and kudos. also, quit smoking.

Dafeenah said...

Seriously I so would not have thought of something that amazing. Apparently I am more tone deaf than I realized because I was reading according to the them of the Beverly Hillbillies, but once I saw your comment and read it again according to the right theme it made so much more sense.

Trish said...

Ha! I love it! So funny, clever and well written. Good job!

alyssa said...

awesome!! :D

Karla said...

This was such a good prompt and so insightful into the personality of the man whose pockets we spy. ;) Nice job!

Lazidaisical said...

This was excellent! Um, the pressure of reading it to a jingle made sounds get all muddled up in my head! :) I don't think I was reading it to the sound of Gilligan's Island; but it still turned out great.