Monday, February 4, 2008

Ginny is Threatening Me...

Apparently I'm not the big spender Ginny was expecting me to be. Honestly, I've never heard of her before, but if I don't "Choose and Charge," I'll never receive her fabulous catalog again, which, among other things, boasts items "For Your Home," "For You," or "For Family and Friends": Makes me wonder how I ever got along before...

I have to assume, though, that no one in my familial or social circle is hoping for a teal toaster oven...

I could be wrong... After all, my mother owns a light-up rooster. What could compliment that more than a teal toaster oven? Perhaps floral pots and pans that can only be washed by hand? A pink flamingo which shoots water from it's mouth into a bird bath? Mom, you'll have to get back to me--Mother's Day is coming, and I'd hate to let another "great gift" opportunity go by without tackying up the ol' house a bit more... :D

Of course, Ginny puts it nice enough... Right below the sticker that screams in bold, red letters "You Are Pre-Approved!" is a sticker that reads "LAST CHANCE!: This could be your FINAL CATALOG! Please order TODAY to receive future editions!" (Will they become collectible, Ginny? Will I see future editions of your catalog on eBay for hundreds of dollars?) Alas, not only am I not worth the $1.50 it takes to mail the catalog to my address if I don't order from the first ever copy of said catalog I've ever received, they don't even have the decency to spell check my name: "Jason Hughs" was the actual intended recipient for "Choose and Charge" fun and games...

Of course, that isn't as bad as the gay and lesbian newsletter "Rosalind Diehl" still receives today, courtesy of our mail box...

On the bright side, if I do place my order in the next 60 days, my "Pre-Approved" status gets increased an "Additional $200!"

Almost makes me wish I needed a teal toaster oven...

1 comment:

mom said...

hello jason! i am very surprised you didn't find a light up chicken to go with my light up rooster in this catalog! :) maybe some little light up chicks? :) you know my light up rooster is very nice and it is a stain glass light up rooster i have you know!! you are so jealous! you really don't need to get me a teal toaster oven since that does not match anything in my house and if you ever get me a pink flamingo i will really have to put into practice that love the sinner and hate the sin thing! what is this pick on mom week or something? what did i do to you? bucky is getting upset with you! maybe you can find me a doe head for my other wall so my buck has a friend in this catalog! :) :) love and prayers