So I Have a Virus...

No, nothing that horrendous! Geez, what do you people think about when I'm not around? Bad, bad reader!

It's just your run-of-the-mill common cold. Nothing fancy, no bell's or whistles proclaiming the end of all mankind, hell, it's not even a subsidiary of Flu, Inc.! But alas, it is very draining. And annoying.

And being that even when I am tired and annoyed, my brain still took this as an opportunity to think about Intelligent Design, and what the hell kind of Intelligent Designer would make a cold virus? I mean, what the hell? If the ID was so intelligent, wouldn't he/she have made the world without a silly virus known only to annoy you? Why make viruses at all? Couldn't ID think of another method of population control?

So, as I'm laying there in bed, snot dripping and hacking up a lung which I will preserve in case I may need it back again in the future, now I'm pissed. My nose is clogged, my throat is dry, it's 2 in the fucking morning, I need to get up at 6:30 to drag my ass into work and deal with people who don't know how to do anything and have ridiculous deadlines, but what am I really angry about? Not that I'm a host to a microorganism that can't be killed, not that I have a job that starts too early in the morning, but at the so-called Intelligent Designer.

Apparently the ID skipped school, because basic science and biology class could point out a whole host of stupid things he/she could have incorporated into this chaotic world. I mean, why do we even need our wisdom teeth when most people need them taken out, or they'll die of infection? (I, fortunately, still have my wisdom teeth, but am missing an appendix, a lot of cartilage around my right knee, and a hunk of skin off my spine, not to mention several annoyingly placed chicken pox scars...) So, where's the intelligence in the wisdom tooth? The appendix?

I am going to start a petition. To rename the Intelligent Design movement to "The Flawed Designer" argument. It's more accurate, acknowledges the imperfections that evolution is still working toward getting rid of, and doesn't set anyone's hopes too high.

Really, I would think that most people would make fun of the great IDer if only because he thought the sun wasn't a star, wasn't needed to give off light, thought the moon did give off light, and never bothered to mention when he created the cockroach. I mean, let's face it, they, too, are indestructible, so if you ask me, the cockroach must be the real chosen people of God.

Which really makes me wonder... How gross and disgustingly dirty will heaven be?