Tuesday, April 4, 2006

What Do Robertson & Falwell Have to Say?

I know, I know, like anyone truly cares...

But, I mean, I, as a homosexual, was personally to blame for the 9/11 attacks, the hurricanes in Florida and New Orleans (okay, the New Orleans one wasn't Robertson), and I'm sure the list could go on and on....

Now we hear about all these tornadoes in the midwest... You know, the supposed heartland of America that votes Republican and goes to church.... Did they do something to piss off god? Why is it that I get blamed for anything that happens in a democratic area, but when it happens in a red state, it's simply "nature"? (BTW, Tamie, if you're reading this, e-mail to let me know you're okay!!!!!)

Make sure you all donate blood in the coming days... I mean, you should all be donating blood anyway regularly, but if this freaky weather continues, the Red Cross is gonna need it.

Back to the subject at hand: Who actually listens to the likes of Falwell and Roberts? Or even Ann Coulter, for that matter. Does anyone know anyone? I know that you, my millions of adoring fans and readers, must know someone who listens to them.... cause I certainly don't... Of course, would anyone with a lick of common sense listen to someone who says: "“I know one man who was impotent who gave AIDS to his wife and the only thing they did was kiss."--Pat Robertson

Ooops! Scratch that, I think my grandmother watches the 700 club. Of course, she loses out on the "lick of common sense" prerequisite. I'd call her to ask, but I don't feel like dealing with the drama. Maybe I'll send her a letter... or maybe god will le her know I thought about her by sending a tornado her way...

I mean, hell, if I'm going to be assigned superpowers by Falwell and Robertson, I may as well use them for good, eh?

In other news, I'm really bored right now, so I'll sign off. Have a great day everyone!

No comments: